The Emperor's New Clothes

Friday, August 14, 2009

So as indicated in one of the earlier posts about our trip to New York, Manda and I went to the MOMA for several hours one day. For anyone who doesn't know, the MOMA is the Museum of Modern Art. And for anyone who doesn't know me, modern art isn't really my thing. Manda loved it, so I indulged her, and now I never need to go back.

While modern art isn't my thing, and really art appreciation isn't really my thing (we also spent a day at the Met and that was somewhat tortuous, although much less so than the MOMA), I am able to appreciate the artistic talent of the pieces. We did the audio tour, which entails carrying around what looks like an old cell phone, into which you type numbers to hear the curators and art critics talk about pieces. I had a really hard time getting through the audio explanations, because I feel like the majority of the time the artists don't put nearly as much thought into the painting as later interpreters credit them with. In other words, I feel like the critics like to hear themselves speak, so they make up a bunch of bull to sound deep and so understanding of the tortured soul of the artist.

Anyway, just because I don't want any of the art, doesn't mean it isn't art...except the crap that isn't art. These pictures are a few examples of some of the things they had on display that cannot seriously be art. For anyone who thinks they are, the emperor is really naked, he doesn't have a new suit on.

Of all of these pictures this one is my favorite (in all seriousness) but only because it reminds me of Qbert. This is somewhat artistic, but it is just theft of the Qbert game screen


Maybe it is just my simplistic mind, but what is artistic about a rope, especially if the artist didn't even make the rope. If the artist made the rope, then maybe there is some argument, although not a strong one.

Ok, a piece of fabric stuck to the wall. There is no design on the fabric, no apparent shape to it, it is a solid color, and stuck to the wall. Seriously? Maybe the emperor should have ordered his suit in this color.


This is one of my favorites, in a sarcastic way. Its description is nylon cord and metal brackets. It is a purple nylon cord running through four metal brackets, two on the wall, two on the floor. Wow!

This may come in handy if your kids are acting up, but it is really just a very skinny steel cage.

I have moved and stacked a lot of bricks in my life, I never knew I was being artistic. There are 120 bricks here, stacked in the middle of the floor. I thought they were getting ready to display something on top of them, but no, this is supposedly art.

I think this one was my absolute favorite. I know it looks brown, but that is because I was not using the flash and I don't know how to use the camera as well as Manda so I can't get good color. It was actually black. That's it! No detail. No indentations. Nothing. It is oil on canvas, an it is solid black! What the hell?!?!

These pieces of "ART" (and I use the term loosely) somehow are deemed to be good enough to be displayed in a world renowned museum. Who are the pretentious morons who are doing this? These are being displayed in the same museum as van Gogh's Starry Night, and Warhol art work, along with many other pieces of art that I don't like, but I can at least appreciate the artistic value of them. Art is whatever you can get away with, but seriously, the emperor is naked. Get him some clothes!

4 comments:

You are such an uncultured red-neck Spencer. Come on, can't you see that the rope signifies that the artist, in his anguish, is tied to society(the floor) through so many unwritten rules that don't allow him to pursue his untethered freedom (the wall)? Actually I agree 100% with what you said. Sometimes people try so hard to find some new, unique art that they end up forcing crap to be accepted as beautiful. If I were you, I would have taken a dump on the pile of bricks and then it would have been art. It would have been titled "Shitting Bricks".

Anonymous said...
August 15, 2009 at 2:39 PM  

Amen to you and Cody. At least you made me laugh really hard for the day! Thanks.

Stephanie said...
August 18, 2009 at 10:13 AM  

hahaha!! I loved your post! Keep em comin! Derek and I still need to get together with your fam one of these days!

Tawna said...
October 24, 2009 at 10:48 PM  

While I think this post is funny, I think it is time for a new one :)

Tawna said...
March 4, 2010 at 9:05 PM  

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